a boots-on-the-ground view of the change that's a-foot

Aliens and Angels

The human condition is complicated.

I was thinking about that this morning in the woods. That’s where I go every morning. I’ll say it’s for the dogs, of course, and sometimes I believe that when it’s cold and rainy and I am absolutely convinced I want to stay in bed but they open their eyes and give me that look of “Let’s go.”

But I know something about my own voice that often says, “let’s go” and I learn a lot during that time in the woods as the thoughts roll on through, uninterrupted, except occasionally, when Ayla and River decide to cause some trouble. Which happens often, and I wonder just why they can’t just be perfectly polite companions like those Golden Retrievers or Greyhounds rescued from the racetrack, and then I realize that they are not so non-human after all…

Because some of us were born to cause some trouble, to be compulsive or impulsive, even if it’s just within ourselves. We need it. We crave it. We thrive on it. We also suffer from it.

Each time my little life starts running along smoothly, I will find something wild and illogical start brewing inside. Something that will definitely be difficult and most likely cause some trouble inside and possibly outside myself. Nothing overt, but deep and intense and secret. And I’ll feel a little fear, but also a little surge of adrenaline – like a mental bungee jump.

Isn’t this the curse of the cultural creatives? The artists that turn themselves and sometimes their lives, over to their muse, even when it is certain to drag you through some mud. They accept their alien status and listen. Even when it’s dark and shadowy and risky. They have to.

Bob Lefsetz, a long-time author and blogger about music, musicians and the industry they navigate, said this yesterday:

“Our greatest stars were alienated.  They were not the cheerleader or the captain of the football team.  They were closer to suicide than being voted most popular. “

I was – and still am – the kid who uncomfortably straddled that fence, led, and often deserted by, my dark muse. Or was it really angels?

One Response to “Aliens and Angels”

  1. phyllisdiehl Says:

    your doing that “nasty” thing again, getting me to think……………….

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